Happiness as an Action

Emotions by their nature are not static states. They ebb and flow. Accepting the vicissitudes of life helps us avoid despair. Contentment is an easier target than happiness, but advertising and other forces drive the average person away from this goal. The need state created by marketing keeps most folks wanting things they don't have. This challenge will be taken up in a future post. Although happiness is fleeting, it is easier to explain and operationalize. Spending a part of almost every day engaged in an activity which is truly rewarding is central to "feeling" happy. Whatever it may be, it must be healthy and reach deep enough to soothe our soul or spirit. I use the concept of "getting into the flow" or losing track of time and worries to help individuals identify the activities. The effective possibilities are diverse: weeding, knitting, running, bird watching, polishing silverware, compiling songs into homemade music cds, whittling, puzzles of all kinds, tending a fire or staring at fish in an aquarium. It cannot be associated with drudgery or obsession. Broadcast television and internet surfing are not calming or restorative. They distract, and this may even be desired at times. However, they don't cause us to hum with gladness or smile for hours afterwords. Each person has to find these activities which "flow" on their own. It does not have to make sense to anyone else. Several times I have done men's groups in which the members had to find this sort of activity and share it to graduate. The variety presented has been astounding: from model trains to yoga to frisbee golf. The goal is action which is rewarding for its own sake and does not require a perfect outcome. In the past, people often accessed this genre of activity while at rustic cabins on vacation. Some of these activities have been found to alter brain waves and contribute to improved physical health. Finally, we actually need more than one of these avocations in our quiver to allow for the seasons and inclement weather. At a minimum, one indoor and one outdoor activity is recommended.